Zohner tried to catch a hammer with his face this week so he's a little out of it.  It might explain why he's so excited for new emoji designs in Android O, honestly.  Meanwhile, Microsoft is none too happy that the NSA decided to keep some vulnerabilities to itself and Apple pulls the classic "It's not us, it's you" with exploding headphones.

"You can use any battery! Except that battery you used.  That one might kill you."

Headlines:

* That wacky N. Korea is at it again!
* No good hacker goes unpunished
* Ooooh Microsoft is PIIIIISSSED!
* NSA might have to disclose any vulnerabilities they find
* Want to hack the President? Just wait for the weekend
* Google I/O happened, I guess
* Android O teases new emoji designs. Everyone freak out!
* Apple is so hungry for profit in China, it may just be their undoing
* Classic Apple: "You bought the batteries wrong"
* The drama behind drone registration continues
* Instagram brings out new face filters. No one cares
* LG Watch Sport not coming to Verizon after all
* Stupid device is stupid
* AI creates new colors . . . names one "Turdly"

Zuke's Favorite: Mass Effect Andromeda, Glove & Boots style

Zohner's Favorite: Honest smart watch commercial