You Can't Make It Up

Jewish cuisine is an oxymoron...

Passover it on. Ah, Pesach. Eight days of pushing aside good tasting food and drink for ... yuck! Keeping Kosher not your thing? Say it with us... Bacon!



Oh, get over yourself. Nothing here is sacred. (see 12 Days of Dumb)...

Can anyone here PLAY this game?

Casey Stengal paid a visit on the eve, and as visions of Choo Choo Coleman danced in our heads, the old professor likened the futility of his dreadful, '62 Mets to the ignorance and utter incompetetence of those guardians of our native tongue. It's true. English is...

Freud Saves

Houses of worship are getting into our act this time of year. We take you on a guided tour of some pretty stupid signage - crafted, apparently, to grow the congregation. How's that working out for ya, padre?



Holiday songs by...

Gift of Life 1, FDA 0 ...

The government has dubbed him a "one man sperm bank" and demands he abstain. But Trent Arsenault, father of 14 (four more on the way), says his free disseminations to women he meets online must continue. "Couples and women who can't conceive need me." Maybe so, but you've g...

A putz by any other name...

Here's the thing about gag gifts. They scream "frat house loser" and make recipients feel icky. No wonder it's a multi-million dollar industry. Chia Pet Obama heads, Hillary Clinton toilet bowl brushes and Cougar soap are big business. America, you ROCK!...

In this corner...

Nothing ratchets up the Battle of the Sexes like the holidays. Especially when one of you earns the lionesses lion's share of the household income. We discovered an interesting end-game tactic of our species. To call off the fight the really stupid (or diabolical) bread winners...

Neighbors make bad fences...

But when the heist involves three major holiday icons, well, let's see YOU unload this loot! We consult Mr. Holmes who reminds ...

when you've eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth...

Oxymorons for 500, Alex...

Just in time for Mensa’s annual holiday party: the Smartest Bar in America. If you thought drinking and thinking don't mix, you've never knocked back a few brews with the bar trivia gang at the Mezzanine in Houston, TX. Bet those pickup lines get real creative by clos...

Donald Draper slept here...

We found a treasure trove of the dumbest holiday ads eveeeeer created. If you've been very good little boys and girls this year we'll stuff a few in your stocking. Gotta run, Santa's into the sangria again. Happy 5th Day of Dumb, y'all!...

If Stanislavski could tweet...

He'd have thousands of 150 year old followers. Imagine the stench. And his book 'An Actor Prepares?' I've read it. Hell, I've used it. Trust me, there's nothing in there about Twitter. What if I show up where you work and tweet over your shouler? Hey, I think FOX just...