One of the appealing things about sex is the vulnerability. It is a situation where you can be physically vulnerable with another person and let yourself go. It is the discomfort, nervousness, awkwardness, that makes it exciting and more pleasurable. This is why when couples say…â€keep it exciting†what they are talking about is trying new things (positions, toys, environments, etc) that taking them a little out of their comfort zone and bring back some of the vulnerable/ awkward feelings. 

Why is it that great sex so often fades for couples who claim to love each other as much as ever? Can we want what we already have? Why does good intimacy not guarantee great sex? Why is the forbidden erotic? Why does the transition to parenthood deliver such an erotic blow? And when we love what do we feel and when we desire how is it different?